I have never felt pain like this before. Or have I experienced it some time ago but have forgotten what it feels like? Tha pain when you know or finally realise that the one whom you love and whom you have been patiently waiting for with hope has someone else. What's worse is that I had actually heard her voice over the phone early this morning, whispering i the background.
I felt, still can feel whenever I recall the telephone conversation, my whole body creeping up on my person, (or is it cringing?) at the self realisation that I have been a class act one Fool. I want to cry but I cannot, not here.
But then again, looking back over the past months, I do not blame him. It was inevitable I suppose that he will find someone to love because when one is young the choicest one has is limitless because one not married. By the time one has decided that one has had enough and decides to marry, only then one realises all the past loves and thinks back on them with fond remembrances. And I did tell him all these, being part of my experiences (so, how come is it that I cannot handle it or accept it?)
When pain learns our name, it becomes much harder to handle or tame.
ReplyDeleteWhat you need, Ayesha is a Margarita, a chic flick and a huge dose of Loreena McKennit eg Never Ending Road graduating into Five For Fighting's Transfer. Steal some attitude!!!